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Tag Archives: advice

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1. How to not make friends: refer to someone as “ethically flexible”. Oops.

2. There are a lot of terrible things happening in the world. People are allowed to talk about/mention/feel sad about different things, even if you feel like those things are not as important/tragic/terrible as the things you think are terrible/tragic/important. Just like people are allowed to be happy, even though there are terrible things happening. No one has to wallow in all of the misery at once. You are not the director of the world’s actions. You don’t get to proclaim what’s important and what’s not. Basically, shut up! 

3. sometimes it is forever; other times it is nothing at all.

4. Do some people just enjoy being cynical? I can’t understand it. How can you even have the energy to be so mean-spirited, hateful, angry, blunt, wrong, foolish? Does it give you some kind of pride? Does it make you happy? Does it feel like you’re doing the right thing? Are you lashing out at some unknown attacker? What are you doing?! What. Are. You. Doing. Just stop! Good grief. Do you need a hug?

5. At some point, no matter how nice/funny/smart/good-looking someone is, the little things they’ve done or said that you’ve disliked in a deep-down sort of way add up. And it’s sad, heart-breaking, whatever. But it happens. And they just aren’t the person you thought they were/you didn’t know who they were to begin with.

6. good things from the past month of my life: sparklers in the middle of the road at midnight, polite strangers, tiny presents of tiny stickers from tiny children, mail from Panama and America, learning possessives in French (but please don’t ask me to actually prove it!).

7. You can do it all differently tomorrow.

8. Orange Is the New Black is a great show! I never believe it. It’s always true.

9. It’s real fun living in the middle of a giant city, especially at night, when you hear murderous screams/manic laughter from outside your window and you’re never sure if it’s either or both or just a crazy alley cat.

10. We’re more than halfway through the year, World, and I’m not really sure if we’re being any kinder to each other. Let’s try harder. Let’s all keep going.

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1. I wish I was cool enough to say “big ups”.

2. Stop assuming he/or she hates you. Just ask, then you’ll know for sure that they do!

3. Let’s all love and care about each other a little more this year.

4. You don’t have to know what you want to be when you grow up! You never have to know! Next time someone asks you what “career” you want, just throw a flower/balled up piece of paper/dollar/smile at them and run away!

5. Romania is “in” this year. Let’s go! Are you buying me the plane ticket? I only do window seats. Thanks!

6. For the past month, I’ve suspected that 2014 is going to be good. Now I hear that Paolo Nutini is releasing a new album this year! Fantastic.  April 14th, where are you?

7. Not all stories have happy endings.

8. The only thing more interesting than art students is their hair.

9. No, really, what are we supposed to do with all these Beanie Babies??

10. Put a dollar bill (or the equivalent, international friends!) under someone’s windshield wiper the next time you’re in a parking lot. Do it! Then tell me about it.

1. Don’t ever wave at cars without the driver/passenger of said cars waving at you first. Otherwise the person driving won’t see you and you’ll end up having waved at a car. This is an important life lesson.

2. Nope. I still don’t like babies.

3. In High School you’re told to choose what you want to be when you grow up. In College you’re told to pick a major that will help you become what you want to be when you grow up. Then you graduate and do whatever the hell you want. People find themselves in places they didn’t expect to be back in High School, or even in College, but it turns out alright.

4. Just do what makes you happy. Don’t over-think it.

5. I think the sort of music people listen to matches the beat of what’s usually going on in their heads.

6. Every day that you’re hesitant about doing something is another day that passes you by. Life rolls on. Keep moving.

7. Make it happen. The days of waiting for someone else to do it, or, “You know what’s a good idea?” are over. Who’s going to do it if you don’t? No one. Exactly. Or, someone else will steal your great idea and become super famous and successful and happy. (Probably not.)

8. Life rolls on. Keep moving — but slowly enough that you head in the direction you truly want to go.

9. Know when to get out of the way.

10. Can we (we= everyone on the entire planet) please stop (over-)using the following words: “gentrification”, “millennials”, and “creatives”. I must have missed the please-use-these-words-every-other-sentence-in-order-to-sound-hip/intelligent memo. Stop. Just stop.

1. If you got to know that person you don’t understand/know very well, maybe you’d find someone like  yourself. Maybe you’d understand them, maybe you could even be friends. If not, at least you tried to be sympathetic and not an apathetic asshole. More people should be like you!

2. Don’t worry – having weird/awkward experiences will just make you a better/more interesting person in the end! You’ll have the best stories to tell.

3. If someone asks for your help, before you answer them, ask yourself this: if they needed me to do this right now, would I do it? Reply accordingly.

4. No one wants to hear about how cute/smart/funny your pets/children are. They don’t care and they desperately wish you would stop talking so they could stop attempting to look interested.

5. That boy doesn’t know that you’re interested in him – and why is that? Because you’re attempting to show him that you’re interested by avoiding eye contact. AKA, by showing that you’re not interested. Er, what? Either take what you want, or don’t.

6. Stop telling me to smile. Why would I walk around with a smile plastered to my face? I’m not upset, this is just how my face looks! Life isn’t all smiles – so leave me and my face alone!

7. Is it bad that I always assume you’re drunk after 9PM?

8. I currently have a hidden stash of christmas presents in my room that are for my family members. I’m like a creepy hoarder santa!

9. Don’t you come on my website, comment on my About page, and then leave. Um, no. That’s not how we do it here, and your attempt at self-promotion has now been deleted. #getoutstayout

10. People who use hash tags when they are somewhere other than on Twitter really irk me.

1. Recently while watching TV at work I yelled “Your boobs look great!” at an infomercial about “special” bras. These things happen.

2. All I really want is a pouty European boy with a weird accent.

3. How long has it been since you built your last couch cushion fort?

4. If someone warns you that your beverage is hot, don’t test it out for yourself and burn your tongue. Just believe them.

5. There are people out there doing what you want to be doing. Maybe you think you can’t do it – but you can! They did!

6. What ever happened to Lady Gaga? Remember her?

7. I really want to hire a Psychologist and have them diagnose people with different mental disorders by only looking at their tumblr pages.

8. Just because spellcheck says it’s a word, doesn’t mean you’ve got it right. (Actual real life Facebook example: “Some of Gods greasiest gifts are unanswered prayers!!” So greasy.)

9. Sometimes I think people just keep the Starbucks cup they got that one time and refill it with coffee from home. You don’t actually go to Starbucks that often, right? Right?

10. It’s time to step it up a notch. Turn it up a step. You get what I mean. Go for broke! Go big or go home! Go to Bed! Wait, what?

1. Read your Book.

No, seriously. Really. Read it. Sure, your professor may have assigned 35 pages for tonight’s homework. I know, that’s a lot. And, it’s probably boring. Biology? Psychology? Philosophy? I know, I know – going to long, boring lectures is one thing, but, reading? No way! At least skim it, OK? Soon you will master the technique of reading as a college student – headers, bold words and phrases, key terms in the back of the chapter. You paid enough for that book – you might as well use it!

2. Don’t Skip.

No, you don’t have to go to class. I know – freedom! It’s great. You can just stay home, sleep in, play on the computer, generally lounge about. Tell your parents class is cancelled that day, or make up some other excuse for still being in bed at noon. One more perk of being a college student: You don’t actually have to go be a student in college! But, take it from me, a once serial-skipper. Skipping class just isn’t worth it in the end. For one thing, there’s the guilt. Yes, it will hit you. Gee, I probably should have went to class. It’s only an hour and fifteen minutes! You couldn’t take an hour and fifteen minutes out of your busy stare-at-the-computer-screen schedule to go to class? And, if you skip once, where does it end? I didn’t go to class last time.. and now I have no idea what’s going on in class this time.. sooo, I guess I’ll just stay home – again. Going to class is always the better option. Sure, you have to get out of your pajamas, but you get to go educate your brain! Ask yourself this: why are you signed up for classes, anyway? Why are you paying lots of money/taking out lots of loans just to not go to class? Don’t skip! Seriously. Don’t.

3. Make Friends.

College is different from High School in that the people there are educating themselves by choice. You have to go to High School – not so for University! The college crowd may not be what you expect, either. There are older people there. Like, your parents’ ages. And, they’re cool! They’re interesting! Of course, there are younger students as well. But these people are not just the folks that happen to live in your school district – they’re from all over the place! Different cities, different states, different countries. They have different accents than you do. Different experiences. Different stories to tell, different lessons to teach you. Getting to know these people is one of the greatest rewards you can glean from going to college. Sure, you’ll get an education and a piece of paper with your name on it – but the people you’ll meet along the way are worth more than your degree. Talk to them! They are people, too! Colleges and Universities are full of the sorts of people you want to be friends with. So go for it.

4. Explore.

Ah, the college years. The socially designated time to figure out who you are, what you want, and how you’re going to get it. Who am I? Where am I going? What do I want to eat for lunch today? All very important questions. College is definitely the place to explore. That can mean literally explore, like, wander around campus and find the best smoothie place. And, it can mean explore yourself, like, do I even like math? Do I want to be friends with those sorts of people? How do I want to spend my time here on this planet? And, it can mean explore your options. What sort of job do you want? What things do you like learning about? What do you want to research, or write about, or get involved in? If you’re confused about any of those kinds of things, college is the place to figure them out. There are people who have that job. They want to help you figure yourself out! You don’t have to know right away what you’re doing. It took me almost two years to figure out what I even wanted to Major in. Explore, explore, explore. It’s what college is for!